A Dose of Not So Tasty Reality

So, in the last couple days I have come to a realization that was pretty sad to conclude. I have mixed feelings, but I am deciding to share it with all of you so that I can admit fully to myself the reality of it. Lets just say it is a classic case of lying to yourself (we all know what that's like).

When I started my overall journey in January I was too afraid to get on the scale right away. I worked really hard for a couple weeks, lost enough that I could see a difference and then got on the scale. Well the results were still REALLY depressing so, I told myself that that was my starting weight and I would never see it again and moved on. Looking back over the last week and in some discussions that I have had, I was forced to stop lying to myself. Yes, it is great that I have lost practically 30 pounds since that awful weigh in in January. However, that number on the scale in January was NOT my real starting number. As it sadly turns out (and may I say, it was like a kick in the gut when this was realized) I was actually 20 pounds heavier to start with than I had let myself accept.

My first reaction? Well, that was shock, denial, nausea, and attempts at excuses. My second reaction? I am a strong capable woman who has finally realized her self worth and; is willing to let hard work, in an effort to enjoy her life and family, be what defines her now. I have worked too hard to be ashamed of where I started. I am proud of where I am now and who I am becoming. And, I will never see that other woman again!

The reality is: I Have Lost 50 Pounds Since January and I Am Proud of Me Because I Am Worth It!

Thanks for all of your support and love,

Jenn